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Fame:
“The cool thing about being famous is traveling. I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff.” -- Britney Spears


New Zealand
Now, they say that New Zealand is beautiful and I do not know -- because after 22 hours on a plane any landmass would be beautiful.” -- Lewis Black 

Taking Photos
“When you hand someone a camera, why do they act like you just asked them to dissemble a bomb? They take it and they're like, 'What do I do … I don’t really ... ha-huh ...' Yeah, it’s the button on the top right where it always is since the beginning of #*@! time!” -- Dane Cook 

Air Travel
“Airplane travel is nature’s way of making you look like your passport photo.” -- Al Gore

Pre Boarding:
“What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?” -- George Carlin 

Flight Delay:
People say there’s delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours, that used to take 30 years, a bunch of people used to die on the way there, have a baby, you would end up with a whole different group of people by the time you got there. "Now you watch a movie and [go to the toilet] and you’re home." -- Louis C.K. 

Taking Photos
When you hand someone a camera, why do they act like you just asked them to dissemble a bomb? They take it and they're like, 'What do I do … I don’t really ... ha-huh ...' Yeah, it’s the button on the top right where it always is since the beginning of #*@! time!” -- Dane Cook 

Airport Sinks
“What is the story with the airport sinks, that they will not give us a twist-on twist-off human faucet."Is it that too risky for the human population? We have to do the one-handed pain-in-the-ass Alcatraz-style faucets. "What is it they think we will do? Turn 'em all on full, run out into the parking lot, laughing, pushing each other into the bushes?” -- Jerry Seinfeld 


 


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